I’ve been reflecting overnight and this morning about why I suddenly feel the urge to start creating again. Why I want to be seen to be putting things out in the world again. Why I suddenly feel an ability to overcome the Resistance that’s been holding me back. It turns out it doesn’t matter why.
I’m sure a part of it is down to mental and physical energy levels1 . But a huge part of it is down to Tim Ferriss and his conversations with Seth Godin. I’ve gone back and listened to all three now2 and they fill me with the urge to sit at my desk, in front of my screen and that flashing cursor on the blank display and begin to fill it with words.
For some reason, though, I found myself not wanting to say that out loud. I didn’t want to tell people that it’s all just one person (or two people, I suppose) that’s given me the final kick to start doing things again. I was embarrassed by it. Of all the things to be embarrassed about, I don’t know why that particular one stuck.
Then it hit me. Well, two things hit me. Both of them with the resounding, clanging echo of a frying pan to the face.
Firstly, it doesn’t matter why I’m motivated to write, create and share my art with people. What matters is that I’m doing it. What matters is that I see the blinking cursor on an empty page and start to hit the keys to form the words to write the piece to share my art.
Secondly, if I want this to be an honest place to write and share my stories–something I’ve always tried to ensure–then admitting the things I’m embarrassed to admit is the first step to reestablishing the things that made this blog the place I wanted it to be when I first began.
Step by step, post by post, as frequently or infrequently as they come, I want to recreate and evolve what this site used to be: a place to capture positivity even in the dark days and a place to celebrate the bright days when they are here.
That’s what I need right now. It doesn’t matter why I’m inspired or motivated to do it. It doesn’t matter why I do it at all. It doesn’t even matter whether or not anyone wants to come back and read any of it But, you know, please come back and read it.